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my partner wants to be in an open relationship and im not comfortable with it
he said his ex broke him bad and he cant be truly happy in a commited relationship but i've been pushing aside my own needs-that includes sleep, eating, and spending time with others- to try and help but i just cant do this
this caused a mental breakdown and me to sob for a good 3 hours today. I dont wanna make him commit even if he doesnt want to thats me being like his ex but I dont wanna loose him at all. i love him more than my own family and will do anything for him but I have my invisible line and this is where i draw it.
I cant but im willing to sit and suffer again if it means that hes happy even though i know thats not right for me to do. it will give me the chance to hyperfocus on school again and block everything out.
i dont wanna sound like a jerk but I dont wanna share them. i finally feel loved and their not okay with a commited relationship. im greedy with this. hell i get mad when he jokes around with others that i know like him.
i just dont know what to do anymore. im not leaving him but i dont want to be forgotten. ive tried telling him thid but he doesn't seem to understand what im telling him.
i told him i wasn't cool with it but it seems like he thinks im 100% on board with this. i dont want him to be with another person that could potentially end up hurting him and thats what ive been trying to tell him but he wont listen.
mabey its for the best if i just leave the relationship and not date again
Comments
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Thestonedwizard
I completely agree with Gray's statement. It seems like he isn't respecting your emotional boundaries by asking to be open. If you can fix this then that's great. Otherwise, you may have to end things there. Sometimes you need to put yourself first.
Gray
Sounds like you know for sure you won't be happy in an open relationship. But if he's still trying to push it on you then sounds like he's being manipulate or trying to emotionally abuse you. What it is isn't healthy at all. You'll have to be assertive about not wanting it. I understand the fear of losing him so all I can say is you'll just have to think of it as you two just weren't meant to be together romantically. I want to say hopefully you'll say as friends but if he's pushing what he wants on you and doesn't care how you feel then I'm not sure I could trust him with anything.