1.2.23

good morninggggg!!!!! i hope everyone is having a lovely new year so far! ♡ ♡

i really did not want to come to school today! i went to bed at around one o’clock in the morning after watching two long youtube videos. i couldn’t sleep much after that. i was tossing and turning for most of the night, and i don’t think i even slept well enough to have a dream! :( i was awoken to my brother moving around at around 5:30. i tried to block out the noise, but i just figured i might as well wake up anyways. 

i got dressed and made a bowl of cereal. we finally have disney+ and hulu after my brother convinced our dad to get it. my brother won’t tell me the actual password for it, so i’ll have to figure it out later. i put on strange world and watched about thirty minutes of it, which is a movie i’ve really wanted to watch while it was still in theaters! it flopped really bad in the box office. i think some of it has to do with homophobia on the viewer’s point, because just like lightyear, everyone went berserk because of the gay scenes. i also definitely think advertising was a problem. the other day, i just received my first youtube ad of the movie. more than a month after it was released! disney was just asking for failure.

i like the movie so far, though. it’s definitely not perfect. it reminds me of onward and the second croods movie because of the scenery and the designs of the characters. i do like the different art style for the humans. i didn’t really like how the characters looked in turning red, but it does seem like disney and pixar are trying to move away from the classic giant eyes art style they’d been grasping on for so long.

anyways! i came to school, and i’m now in my first period trades class. i’m going to switch to my old class from across the hall so i can be with my BFF! ♡

 i didn’t speak to anyone during the entirety of winter break. i ghosted everyone. i just did not feel like talking to anyone, and my mental health was just really bad. there really is no excuse though :( i feel so bad.

i started really ghosting people when i was thirteen. it’s become my natural response to things. i’ll sometimes just ghost with meaning to. i’ll receive a text message and i’ll think, “i’ll respond to that later when i’m in the right mindset,” and then days will pass and i won’t even realize it. or it’s like i know i should reply to this person, but i don’t know what words to use or how and i feel bad for replying so late so i just leave it be. there are people from years ago i stopped talking to, and i think about them every single day.

i’ve made not ghosting people in my new year’s resolutions! i usually don’t stick to resolutions, but i promise i’ll stick to it this time. it’s for the sake of other people and my own! i’ll post my new years resolutions when i get around to writing it! :P

i hope you all have a lovely day! ♡

(p.s, for a bit when the new update rolled out, i didn’t know you could still apply html to your blogs! i like it this way! it was tiring putting br> for every single space hehe)