You cannot stop these roughly adjacent occurrences from interfering with the pre-established systems developed by the American Government which have been specially designed to scrape otherwise unobtainable information from the inside of your mind. 

IN OTHER WORDS

1. I am no longer entirely constructed out of bakelite.
   
2. You will buy stocks in Target regardless of whether or not this is in your best interest.
3. It is now time to broadcast specially encoded signals within the range of 400-790 terahertz to trick every human being within a 15 kilometer radius into thinking they're seeing god, when really they're only seeing an ad for Panera Bread.