This is a simple guide on how to microwave small rodents.

1. Capture the squirrel.

You must first put out a squirrel trap. The two best types of squirrel traps are the paw locker and the peanut triggered glock. These are very common traps, and I expect you to know them, so I won't go into detail here. If you want the squirrel to still be alive you should stick with the paw locker.

2. Prepare the microwave.
If you want to avoid a messy clean up, cover every surface of the microwave in either duct tape or aluminum foil. After the squirrel is microwaved, you can simply remove the tape or foil, and the microwave will be as clean as when you started.

3. Microwave it.
Place the squirrel in the microwave. You want to microwave on high until you can't see the whites of it's eyes. (Fun fact: If properly done, you won't be able to see it's eyes because they should have exploded.) This might take from 2-7 minutes, depending on the power of the microwave and the might of the squirrel.

4. Proper disposal.
After you are done with your warm squirrel carcass, you want to cover it in wood glue and pose it in a natural shape in a nearby tree. This prevents anyone from realizing it is dead. Make sure to remove the tape/foil from the inside of your microwave.

And there you have it! A simple guide to microwaving squirrels.