Recent updates

Not been much going on, on the productivity front in my life recently, but here's a short list of some stuff that's been going on. More or less a brain dump of recent and upcoming events to organized my brain so I can focus on my school work

  • Stressing about my 10 year high school reunion
  • WENT to my high school reunion, saw a bunch of people I actually care about, and had a great time
  • Got in a three car collision (all three vehicles are totaled, and by NC standards since I was the car in the back, I'm at fault for all of them)
  • Lost my license for 30 days
  • Thankfully, my insurance says they can cover up to $8,000 per vehicle
  • I'm getting a little more than $8,000 back for my car (I only paid $8,000 for it)
  • All of the money for my car has to go to a lawyer
  • Going to search online auctions for a beater with whatever's left
  • My nice, Samsung, flip, touch screen laptop died, so I'm on my grandmother's until the basic, pos replacement comes in and gets all of my stuff transferred on to it
  • Finally finished The Crucible series by Sara Douglass
  • Finally called my dad back (after more than a year) for his birthday, and we had a nice two hour conversation
  • Started my Introduction to Computers class for my Accounting degree
  • I'm painting the inside of a FEMA trailer my grandmother and her niece bought to put on the lot where my trailer that was destroyed by hurricane Florence used to be for $400
  • Halloween is next week, and I have no idea what we're doing about trick-or-treating
  • Still have another court case in Carteret County
  • And have to do 24 hours of community service by February for the other one
  • My first appearance for the new one is in November (I'm trying to be a good noodle, I swear!)
  • Realized that a lot of my family has put me through narcissistic abuse my entire life, and it will never fully end until my grandmother dies (which knowing her, will be another 20 years)

I think that's everything that's going on recently. Otherwise, I've semi made a routine for when I get home from work. Not so much for the rest of the day, but as of right now it's:

- get home

- shower

- smoke

- T3 Arena and Pokémon Unite

- dinner

- bed

I've been thinking that maybe if I made more of a weekly schedule (similar to the weekly lunch schedules they do in school, but for everything else) that it might work better than trying to figure out what I should be doing everyday. Especially now that I have to schedule in at least nine hours for school work a week (three hours for every credit hour). That already makes me feel less stress since I've realized it's a three credit hour course instead of four.

Still really need to eat better though. I've been so dizzy recently. My three year old likes to spin my around in the computer chair at my grandmother's, and just one go around has my entire head spinning. Also should really make an appointment to see someone about potentially getting put on a low dosage of adderall. I'm not a big fan of medication, and can usually function fine without anything (not counting a little weed at night to help feel hungry enough for dinner), but if it can help with my ADHD, c-PTSD, AND POTs, then I guess I can give it a try. I've really just gotten used to disassociating my entire life, and had a brief period where it stopped, and don't really want it to stop completely. Like, yeah; c-PTSD sucks, but I've learned a lot from disassociating and somatic flashbacks. A part of me feels like I couldn't fully function properly with them since I've relied heavily on them my entire life as a form of reflection, and entertainment on a few occasions. 

Anyway, I think I've procrastinated on my school work long enough for today, and my youngest has finally stopped trying to use me as a jungle gym. If anyone is reading this, I hope you have a great day, and don't forget to stay hydrated!

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