I hate my stupid fucking brain

I hate my stupid fucking brain. Its all cause I can't tell if you mean this or that if you being serious or not if your joking or not I can't fucking tell but I want to I want you to listen and understand and do something I can't sit here and be clueless it fucking hurts that I can't understand what anything means I  can't stand my stupid fucking brain cause I want to understand but I can't and I don't know what to tell you at this point. Its not fun.