I commited a crime today and I don't regret it!

If I don't make a new blog post for a long period of time then assume I've gone to prison.

It was just after school; I was going to sign in at reception (if you stay after school you need to sign in) and that's when I noticed something. Now for context it was parents evening and they were setting up the tables and displays and stuff, and it was that time I spent looking around the big crowded room as I waited in line to sign in is when I noticed something that would change my life (or at least my afternoon):

A table with cookie trays on.

Now this wasn't your average school wheat pancake with a disappointing lack of chocolate, no this was double chocolate, crispy, crunchy, sweet cookies. This was a once in a lifetime opportunity. I knew what I had to do. But I couldn't just take a cookie: that's stealing! Also, it would be too suspicious, I mean, where would I hide said cookie? I quickly thought of a plan. A great plan. A plan so great it would become standard for any future robberies. 

I went to my locker. I packed my bag with the homework I needed to do. I closed my bag. I picked up my long black coat. I put it on. I could start my plan now.

I dropped my bag off at the after school room and walked back to reception. A quick scan was all I needed to check that the crowd levels were roughly the same as it was 7 minuets ago. Good. I hung around the cookie table and waited for the person behind the table to get distracted. People were taking the cookies left and right, but the difference was they were giving it to their parents. They were noticeably younger too, implying that this was a parents evening for the lower school. My heart was pounding a little as I thought of what the consequences would be; getting lectured, humiliation, or even worse: having to return the cookie. That was an outcome I refused to take. It wasn't long until the person behind the table walked off to ask one of the teachers something.

That's when I strike.

I swiped a cookie, not even hesitating. This is why I needed my coat for this operation: the sleeves on my coat are so long you can't see my hands most of the time. I used that to hide my newly hunted cookie by bending my wrist upwards so if my hand was facing the floor you wouldn't be able to tell anything was there. Instant satisfaction! I walked briskly back to the after school room; not at a speed that would classify as running, but still faster than my normal walking speed nonetheless. 

The cookie tasted as good as it smelled. So good that I considered taking another one. I put much thought into this but I convinced myself not to; it wasn't worth getting heart disease and diabetes over some cookie. I could make better cookies at home (not much better, but still better.)

Somehow I managed to make a story about me stealing a cookie turn into some crime documentary. I could make a good novel if I just constantly listen to "right behind you" from the TF2 soundtrack on loop.