another strange dream - i was a jack o lantern

so i was dead but not entirely dead. i was able to be in the world of the dead but i hadnt actually passed. it was an infinite white landscape with beds lined up in an even grid. there were actual dead people laying in two rows of beds, that was followed by two rows of empty beds, and then the pattern continued with beds filled with dead and empty beds forever.

i was in a group of people who were to walk out and lay in the empty beds and be as still as possible, like offerings. we were supposed to act like we were also dead. i had trouble picking a bed, the sheets were different for each one and i wanted one that reflected my real bed. i had trouble choosing between a gray one that wasnt my style and a yellow one that was my style (my sheets are grey and puffy, but i also like yellow and have a lot of it in my room). i ended up choosing the yellow one.

when everyone laid down, soon the actual dead started to rise and picked up the semi dead one by one. they were choosing us. the tradition was that we would be chosen to be carved like a jack o lantern for the holidays, and in the process, we would die and then we would become part of the actual dead.

the guy that picked me up was newly dead, people who have been dead for longer just started carving their people. newly dead werent used to the tradition so they usually waited a bit longer. i thought maybe i could convince him to let me live while he was thinking. he asked me what i was like in life so that he could carve me in a way that honored my life. i said i worked at a nursing home and so he drew up a plan to carve me into a wheelchair with flames and a little blanket on my lap. he kept asking if the old people really did put blankets on their lap bc he wanted it to be accurate. i said some do.

there were groups next to us that were getting down to carving, and they actually seemed to be having fun together. the one being carved didnt seem to be in much pain, they were both laughing like they were on a family bonding trip. i started to think it wouldnt be so bad to be carved up but i knew i needed to finish school and live my life before i died.

i woke up before i knew if i got carved up or let go. i dont know what wouldve happened. on one hand, i need to see where my life goes. on the other hand, if my time had come, why prolong it? idk it was strange, a little stressful but not exactly scary.