Two Days in 2022 (poems)

March 4, 2022

What do I want to do to live one more day?

To live as the authentic me

Someday, in some way

I would be happy

People’s expectations have defined who I am.

My assumed inferiority and lack of self-esteemed led to my victimization and 

torment.

Stunted personality and tainted growth define who I became 

A shy, introverted, emotionally detached nobody, branded with traumatic events.

Codependency imprisons my true self

A numbness suffocates oneself.

Fear of failure overwhelms my senses

My mind becomes an echo chamber proclamations yelled at a fever pitch "I'm not enough," begin to smell like frankincense.

***This poem adds to my bulletin post asking "How were you able to BE yourself? [Any Tips?]"

March 8, 2022

My voice merely feels a void.

The inflection of my tongue against my mouth

stammers upon words.

My emotions remain unspoken for fear that I would develop cottonmouth

My throat closes in on itself

as my tormentors mimic my phonetic structures

To treat me as less than,,,

To keep me in my place.

I can't be too extreme 

My words would slurred together 

And I have to repeat myself and my feelings.

My excitement is met with dull expressions.

"Sorry, could you repeat that?"

My frustration is assumed to be annoyance and my sighs are unwelcomed.

I repeat myself to closed ears.

Misunderstood because they can't understand my impediment.

A voice is a weapon in the right hands

My cracked hands pair well with my chapped lips.

My voice is a obstacle,,,

An obstruction to my true self that is left unsaid and unheard.