numb

so lately I have been feeling depressed again but not in a sad way, but in a numb way. Every thing in my personal life aside from my dogs, sucks. My boyfriend of almost 4 years has no positive effect on me anymore & idk if that means we're done or if that's just depression. part of me feels like we're done. I love him and leaving him will suck but I just feel like we do the same boring shit. If he's not at work, he's playing xbox or doing nothing. and when I say nothing I don't mean he's lazy bc tho he is lazy he still does dishes and can be productive in that sense. but when I come home from work and see him sitting in the same spot on the couch with his fucking headset playing xbox, I  don't engage in conversation bc I don't need to ask how his day was to know this is what is consisted of. it drives me crazy. and I can be a motivated person but since being with him I have felt myself become demotivated and I feel wrong accusing him of doing that to me but I think it ties into taking the characteristic of your partner. I think that his lack of motivation rubs off on me. I try to stay doing stuff to keep my mind busy and distracted from being bored, I started taking online IT courses, I pick up hobbies, etc, when I mention this to him, he says he's not like that, so basically his only hobby is playing xbox & playing games on his phone. and again, when its time to pull up the boot straps, he can do that but everything else is so boring. I am so bored. I don't even know what to say to him half the time anymore. I feel like I know what I want to do but part of me doesn't wanna be without him so I'm torn.