things are kinda going great

besides yk the usual shit getting yelled at or considered a fucking idiot, everything is going good. my partner may not be physically with me but we still for some odd reason got a stronger connection through out this time they are in Missouri. I felt so happy yet oddly enough sad because I know I cant really show them that, its not to the point where it ruins me but its like a feeling of something heavy on me. I can feel it in my forearms and in between my hips, its heavy but at the same time not heavy. Idk how to explain it but its like the thing I get whenever I have night terrors but not the extreme feeling. It makes me want to talk to my partner more, is this the feeling of missing a loved one? I only get it when I'm not with them or talking to them, it makes me circle abt my thought abt them from appraisal, then sexual, then loving, then missing and then repeat. Oh well just wait till winter break to hug em :/...