the art of music (and sucking at it)

so anyways, i remember in about 5th grade, i learned my best friend at the time had a guitar and knew how to play it. lowkey, i thought that was cool asf, so i basically copied her and asked for a guitar as a bday present. i got a pink one! ...except my brother broke like 1 or 2 of the strings and i didnt know that you could fix strings so i just...threw it out. listen, i was like 10 :(.

either way, moving on, 6th grade rolls around and middle school was definitely a point in my life that i lived! in 6th grade, our music teacher (which, btw, her music class was the first one i had ever taken) was offering piano classes. i was like hell yeah i want to learn piano! so i took the course for about i think 5 months? or 4? and then was going to retake it in 7th grade! ...until she got fired. i wont get into details, but the point is, there went my piano classes! my brother had also bought me a midi keyboard which he set up for me, then i reformatted my computer and didnt know how to set up again until he did it for me like 3 years later. within these 3 years, i had gone through many, many phases, including the aforementioned and beloved tally hall phase, which i am currently still in and do not hope to leave anytime soon. you see, this phase inspired me to start not only writing some of my own music again (literally just lyrics. they're probably just poems at that point), but it also inspired me to start playing! i jammed out on my midi keyboard for a bit until about may.

that brings us to the present day! in may i got a ukulele, and im able to play a few songs on it. its super fun, but its temporary, as i want to get a guitar, specifically an electric guitar, even more specifically, a rickenbacker. i understand ukuleles and guitars have different playing styles for the most part but...its a good segway i guess! so yeah. currently trying to finish a cover of the bidding by august 15th and i have like, absolutely no idea how to mix and master so...pray for me there lololol.

oh, but dear viewer, this blog entry is not done just yet! you see, the last thing that i havent mentioned to you is (cue thunder, lightning, and dramatic sound effect)...

SINGING. (cue the thunder hitting even harder)

ive never exactly been a...good. singer. ive always been pretty mediocre at it, though i do admit (hope) that my singing voice has improved since about the 6th grade where uh. i entered into a talent show. and um. my stage partner wasnt initially gonna do it with me; she said she would then she switched groups and her friend told me why (it was bc i couldnt sing and it sounded like i forced my voice. she was completely right) and she felt bad like i think i mightve guilt tripped her and then she did it w me because she felt bad. jumpscare. yeah i wasnt a good person in middle school. nonetheless, i digress; i forgot part of the rap in the song that we were singing while up on stage and she took over, nothing but grateful for that, she saved me a bit of embarrassment tbh! it still was embarrassing ofc, but wasnt as bad as it wouldve been had we both forgotten the lyrics. but anyways, i sounded like i was forcing my voice on stage too LOL. but yes! i am not the best at singing! and hopefully my cover makes it on the tribute album that im submitting it to! i think thats about it for now!

all in all, music is hard. chords, notes, singing, a lot of it is rly difficult unless your brain is kinda wired for that! i think my brain is creative, but idk ab musically creative lmao.

i hope you enjoyed reading and if u read up to the end i thank u a ton :) i hope you have an amazing day/night/afternoon/dawn/whatever time ur reading this! ttyl <3