i wrote this september 2020, i’m not that sad anymore

i feel like dying i’d be lying if i said i can hold out for much longer lack of peace has made me jaded if tranquility was equated to riches i’d be broke i’m tired of mind acting as if i’m at six flags on their biggest coaster up down round and round i’ve made my way to the top and i’ve officially made my down down into despair down with hope narcotics are my only saving grace i hope no one notices my faces on the way out i hope no one notices i’m on the way out i hope no one feels anything once i’ve gotten there the world still turns days still into night at least for everyone else i haven’t seen the sun in years i only see the light from the flames burning in my life they’re engulfing my space don’t save me for i don’t wanna save myself don’t save me for there are more pressing matters at the end of my story i’m sorry if your world shatters