theres been a lot of looking at the past and imagining things that would have created a much different present based on objectively tiny changes that just would have done things inside my own head. specifically media consumption in the more formative years of my life. im well aware this doesnt make a lot of sense but bear with me and i think i should be able to make something coherent eventually.
neon genesis evangelion is about 14 year olds getting super fucked up. i have watched anime since i was younger than 14 and nge definitely came out before i reached 14. idk whether to call it an alternate universe or whatever but in another life i watched nge at 14 (as opposed to 19) and while i was watching it i was thinking in that other life where i was much younger i can imagine how bad it would have fucked me up. media in general (in this instance we’re talking about anime) has the ability to provide sanctuary for depressed young teenagers who dont think anyone else in the world can imagine what they’re going through because guess what? you’re depressed and starting highschool? here are depressed people your age who are starting highschool and have to use giant robots to fight giant alien things. all these unrealistic things are super easy to latch onto because they lack the realism that suggests a finished story with no room for self inserts. the fact that things are unrealistic but still carry a message just turns media into a metaphor saying “you might not be fighting giant robots but you are a depressed teen so heres a little message about self love, as a treat.”
music is another big one thats harder to realize. solace by red handed denial is a song i found this past year but i know that a 14 year old me would have that blasting constantly. on one hand yea idk if i needed any more deep depressy music than i had already but there was so many other depressy songs that it wouldnt make too much difference. but its one of those things where individuals songs make up the whole of your music taste.
i use the age 14 in these kinda thoughts a lot because thats the age when you start creating your own narrative and your own personality. it actually starts a bit sooner but the jump to highschool facilitates the ability to just up and decide to be different (it’s actually a lot easier than i thought it was back then) but 14 year olds have a lot to think about and the media they are into does a ridiculous amount for creating the personality they will develop for the next era of their life.
hopefully it started making sense along the way but i quite frankly dont care and im not reading it let alone editing. good luck and going night
Comments
Displaying 0 of 0 comments ( View all | Add Comment )