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earlier today my best friend asked if we could go to the beach tomorrow since we only live 15 minutes away from it (i live on the coast). but instead of just telling her no i just came up with different excuses so i wont go. its not like i don't want to go because i don't mind its just that i'm veryyyyy anti-social... and i'm a introvert. i would just rather stay in my room and read a book, watch tv, or scroll on tik tok.
i feel like every time i go out everyone is judging me which probably isn't true. but there's a little voice in the back of my mind that tells me otherwise. and going to the beach with my skin all out is wayyyyy out of my comfort zone. this nothing wrong with my body, but i do have a slight body dysmorphia. i also (TW: SH) have self harm scar on my left arm from 3 months ago that are very noticeable (i'm okay now though... i'm on the road to recovery :))! ) that i'm also ashamed and scared to wear out in the public. i'm scared that very one will judge me about what i did in college. i'm scared of everyone's judgmental eyes. in black people eyes theirs no need for a black person to be depressed which is silly to me. but i'm not writing this for no pity party... i'm writing this because i really hate going out XDDDD!!!! anywaysssss thank you guys for coming to my ted talk... until next time my fellow losers :p.
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˚✧₊⁎𝐂𝐈𝚻𝑹𝐔𝙎⁎⁺˳✧༚
And i relate to the swimsuit thing i get nervous when im wearing a swimsuit cause my hidden garden might be showing if you know what i mean
(btw no one will judge you it don't matter cause they probably smell like booty sweat and booboo crumbs)
˚✧₊⁎𝐂𝐈𝚻𝑹𝐔𝙎⁎⁺˳✧༚
Girl as a formal introvert and someone who's still shy when it comes to my body do what makes you happy don't feel like you have to go anywhere if it makes you uncomfortable and I'm glad your recovering!as i myself has a friend who SH and tried to commit die just want to let you know you're loved and there are people out there that care for you before you give love learn to love yourself self love is important!
thank you so much!! your comment meant so much to me and it actually touched me
by JulieeDaDonn; ; Report
by ˚✧₊⁎𝐂𝐈𝚻𝑹𝐔𝙎⁎⁺˳✧༚; ; Report