Dream and fears

I'm so upset about it solely because it makes no sense.  


I literally am terrified of getting tickled, like afraid of it. It makes me panic. I'll cry and hyperventilate. I literally cannot see how it is enjoyable or something fun and a good joke. Every time I have been tickled in my dreams (more nightmares) I have literally begged for it to stop. I've freaked out every time and woken up in a sweat. One time I literally said in the dream: "I know it's for the dream but STOP" before immediately waking up

But nah last night I have a dream and he's in it (not uncommon, but usually he's just in the background and not doing anything) and he tickles me, and I laugh like I enjoyed it and I DIDN'T GET UPSET OR FREAK OUT OR CRY OR ANYTHING I just thought it was fun. 

And that pisses me off just a little bit. 


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