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I’m childfree. It’s not usually something I focus on heavily as many people I met are pretty chill with it. “Do you want kids?” “Nah, not for me” and subject moving on, barely a why. People just accept it. Mostly.
Lately I’ve noticed a weird rise in people obsessing over kids. I guess it’s because I’ve gotten older and people within my age range are having children. Some do not want to back off. It’s kinda upsetting because some of these people I could’ve seen a friendship with at least if it wasn’t for their “change my mind” obsession.
One guy told me if we dated I have no say in the matter. Before this he was showing very progressive view points. Blocked him and forgot about him.
Another told me I had to change my mind because I’m made to be bearing children (humans aren’t at this point, babies have evolved but the organs… not so much, giving birth is deadly now). Blocked again. He actually had his friend add me and didn’t tell her why I blocked him.
One girl got pretty upset, said she loved children and would be miserable. She asked if it was because of our genders and then went on about bone marrow babies. Blocked again when she decided to bring religion into the mix. Kinda ironic. She blocked me.
Someone was straight up in denial and kept ignoring it. Eventually pushed into repeatedly sending me pictures and photos related to pregnancy and children.
One guy who I was interested in gaming with revealed his big plan to my horrified friend to get me into a relationship with him and wanting me to be a trad-wife.
A teenager was oddly obsessed with my childfree stance. They only heard it once through lurking and afterwards tagged me in a screenshot about “people who hate kids are missing out” and said that’s me. I told them no, I hate kids and to leave me alone. “You were a kid once too” yeah and I was miserable.
Despite all these bad experiences I still have very nice friends and even exes that I remain in contact with and that are respectful of my choices and feelings. It’s not difficult and it’s not anyone’s problem unless they make it their problem. I like existing without children in my life, I like the freedom I feel in my space.
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Rox Paradox
Dude, it's not for everyone and I respect that you recognize it's not for you. There are plenty of people who clearly aren't parent material popping out babies like ping pong balls, setting into motion whole lifetimes of resentment, neglect, and abuse that continue to cycle through multiple generations. I saw so much of that in my previous profession with people insisting that they wanted or even "needed" to have children. Meanwhile, the kids and society pay the price. ::Sigh:: Sorry for the side rant.
Anyway, I have 8 teenagers and young adults - 4 biological, 1 step, 3 adopted, and (probably consequently) 648,236 grey hairs at 41. I love them very much and they're amazing kids, but I'm not gonna romanticize or idealize parenthood- sure, it's "rewarding" but it's also continuously terrifying and difficult (in all new ways as they grow!). I can't imagine trying to persuade, guilt, or coerce anyone to have kids. That's insane. I'd rather admire your self awareness and realistic perspective, which I do very much. I'm sorry people are just garbage sometimes. But, hey, they can eff all the way off while you do you, yeah? : D
I’m actually kinda happy to see this. I was fully expecting an argument to come from somewhere on here because I’ve not been able to vent all that freely about it lately. Your response was very refreshing to read!
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