Practice, vaccines and obsessions

Guitar practice is still strange. My brain memorises all these chords but for some reason the names don’t stick and then I’m told to do a Cad9 and boom; I’m doing a G for some reason instead? How do the professionals remember this shit? I don’t remember shit correctly, my brain gives it a remix! 

I gotta get vaccinated this week. Tried going today but the centre was crowded like zombies from Dead Centre. Instead I went and grabbed a sour apple jolly rancher slush puppy and then went back home. Gonna try Monday morning so hopefully I’ll be able to get the pass for in person class. I still need to discuss my master classes. 

I went to a makeup store too. I’m not heavy on makeup but I got these design ideas and I do want try it more. I am concerned because lately there’s been accusations of Asian fishing and my eyes are just somewhat shaped that way; they become slightly more prominent with makeup. I did try making my eyes look more round but eh, I looked like a doll so I rubbed it off. 

The lady was nice, we were originally looking at Nyx and but the Nyx assistant was absent so she invited me to her section No. 7. She tested my skin and I ended up with Porcelain because I’m pale as shit. It doesn’t cover many of my freckles that well. I hate them. While looking in the mirror I did kinda stare at some prominent scar tissue on my nose. I tore it when I was a teenager and I’ve always had a habit of picking wounds until they leave thick scars. This one is a lump and squishy. I feel like it’s gotten bigger and I might as the doctor if it can be cut off or some shit. 

Badflower released their trailer today. I hate how creepy I feel when I think about similar my thoughts and feelings are to the front man’s. At the same time I feel relief to not be alone. We all co exist for one another and when we feel alone we really aren’t. Someone somewhere stands in a box similar to yours and knows how you feel and what you’re feeling. I feel that way about the songs and I wish I had some way to show that off more. 

I do plan to get the logo tattooed somewhere. Not with the name itself as anything can happen. I’m thinking my knee maybe? Back of my neck? Somewhere it can be seen somehow. I’ve been wearing ripped knees lately. Lovely rips I made myself because I’m five two and no pants seem to actually fit my leg length unless I’m jumping in the petite section. I’m pretty sure I’ll be covered in tattoos by my thirties as it is my expensive way of socially acceptable self harm. The Daisy is cute too as a bonus. Got it on a shirt and the famous Badflower blanket. I love the blanket.