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Category: Friends

How to treat Systems: A Guide by Bianca

Hi, so you have a friend who's apart of a system, thats great! You should probably find out how to treat them and their fictives before something bad happens, so i'm gonna try my best to explain the DO's and DONT's when it comes with interacting with systems!


DO
Be Patient if the host has to step away and someone needs to step in for a little
DONT
Demand the host when they're mentally unwell :( 
DO
be respectful of boundaries and triggers of different alters/fictives, its okay if you forget every now and again but if you start triggering them on purpose its not gonna end well
DONT
make fun of/mock/downplay triggers, you don't know what they've been through!
DO
try to understand the things a system has been through to understand why they act a certain way/do certain things
DONT
downplay their trauma! It's really harmful :(
DO
When talking to a Fictive, keep in mind some of the time they are REALLY attached to their source and depending on the fictive may be uncomfortable with certain things like kinning etc.
DONT
reality check them!! reality checking (unless done so by request) is really harmful to the receiving end and can do a lot of damage
+ When referring to a fictive say "I like this fanart of YOU" NOT! "I like this fanart of [insert character here]" Because that could be reality checking to the person, its all situational but its good to keep in mind!
DO
respect source triggers + don't hate fictives because of their source actions, judge them by their current actions!
DONT
label a fictive as problematic + try to "cancel" them, like I said above, don't hate them for their source actions if they're nothing like that while talking to you!
DO
respect the fact that systems CANT control who shows up as a fictive/alter/introject!!!
DONT
act like we can control who shows up because we cant!
DO
respect our trauma and don't pry for information that isn't your business!!! :(
DONT
fakeclaim systems calling them "fake" 
fictive heavy systems are REAL!, theres no way you can tell a system is faking!! so don't act like you can tell, because you can't!!! Systems are extremely personalized to what the host has been through and how one system acts isn't going to be how another acts, so please keep a open mind!

Here's all I can think of if any fellow system has anymore feel free to write below, thx for reading!!!! - bianca 


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Javier

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Thank you for letting others be aware of Systems! Our System appreciates you!


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