miles away

sometimes i feel like i’m a million miles away from the people i surround myself with. i’m not going to sit here and tell myself that i don’t have anyone in my life, because i do. but i still feel like that. i feel so distant and alone. and there’s truly nothing i can do about it. and it’s kinda scary. when i look at myself in pictures, i think about every time i’ve felt like this and i feel like i shouldn’t even deserve to feel like this. someone as truly ugly as me shouldn’t feel like this because it’s selfish. again, not physically ugly. i don’t believe i’m too shabby physically but i feel that my soul itself is wretched and completely and utterly disgusting.