That anxiety drug

I keep having this feeling that nothing good comes without a price, i think it comes from being a child and doing everything i can to get a positive response from my parents, its hard because now all my body knows is fight or flight and i just dont know how to calm myself, my body revolts against me, i try the breathing, i do the positive thinking and the its oks, it has a hold on me, i have come to understand these triggers and these feelings, why do they push me to burnout everytime, i dont know, i see the signs and still im afraid, im always afraid and thats the thing im afraid but i will stand tall, im filled with anxiety but i will fight back, i just dont get how these two people exist within me and what can i do to tell them both that im here for them its ok to feel these things and they should just merge with eachother, their attributes will eventually beacome my biggest assest, i can see through people and i will say it out loud, im afraid but im not afraid.