jarics bizarre adventure

It was a saturday and Jack and Aric were bored of trying to be cool and they saw george washington outside their window. he was wearing binoculars and he was watching them!!!!!! Wtf!!!

They were all like wtf!!!! Why is george washington watching us!!!! isn't he supposed to be chopping down a cherry tree or something!!!! so they went outside and they killed him with a fork or some weapon. no further explanation. they were all like "fuck yea" but then they saw something AWESOMS!! They saw a spaceship in their backyard. Nasa wanted to thank them for killing goerege washington i guess and they rewarded Jack and aric a free round trip ride to the moon!! all expenses paid. pmg this is what we're using our tax money for!! worth it 

y/n heard some noise from their neighboors and wanted to see what was going on. y/n had a huuuuge crush on Jack and Aric so they were all like !! omg heart eyes is that spaceship!!!! so y/n sneaked onto the spceship and held on as it went into outer space.

"wow" said aircypoo as he looked out the window, seeinf earth getting smaller and smaller and the moon getting bigger and bigger. he would finally have infinite cheese and once he found the macaroni planet he would have infinite mac and cheese!!!!! 

“This is sop cool!!!!” exclaimed both aric and jack.. but unbeknownst to them y/n was spying on them….. evil music plays 

y/n felt their nose tingle. Oh no!! If they sneeze theyll get caught!!!!! A few seconds later, the feeling went away, phew, that was a close one. then all of a sudden they sneezed like super hard!! wtf nose….

the sound (Even tho there is no sound in space shut up) alerted Jack and aric. in unison they turned their head to y/n..and suddenly they fell in love.

y/n started sobbing, sobhing tears of joy…they thought that both jack or aric would want to date them now.. 

“H-h-h-h-h-hey j-j-j-jack… h-h-h–h-h-hh-hey aa-a-a–aric… h-h-h-h–h-how a-a-aa-a-are y-y-y-yy–you.?-?-?-?” y/n said nervously. they did the fingers pointing to each other and made a shy face.

"we are fine wbu" said aric "how about you come in, y/n"

“O-o-o-o-o-o-o–okay..” y/k said shyly

they scooted their way towards the door and opened it. (idk how this is working don't @ us)

y/n sat down on the built-in spaceship couch next to aric 

“So how did you even get here y/n?” jack asked

“I-i-i-i snuck in while you were looking.. Sowey, i can leave if u want *☻️*" y/n tilted their head down in shame

“No!!! its okay dont cry ur too sexy” jack and aric said in sync

y/n gasped!!! they thought y/n was swxey!!!!! "omg" they said, and suddenly the spaceship landed on the moon

and get this!!! it WASNT made of cheese!!!! aric got so mad he sharted. and then he cried bc no mac and chese and also because he sharted:[ he fell to his knees in defeat.. “I-i cant believe this. Ive been LIED TO-” aric said through tears

but look!!! in the horizon!!!! every single us president + the prime minister of britain were standing in a row. they looked angry bc jack and aric killqed their bf georg washingmachine. they wanted to KILL!! and the prime minister was there because reasons. idk

obama walked up to them ominously… "HOW DARE U" he screeched "WHY DID YOU KILL GORG"

"he was staring at us you creep!!" jack retorted. y/n and aric nodded in agreement.

“He was my boyf… he was all of our boyf… how could you…” obama said sobbing

and then y/n smashed his skull in with a moon rock

chaos ensues

“MOON ROCK FIGHT!!!!” abraham linkedin shouts. There were moon rocks.. Flying, everywhere!!!! blood floated in the gravity of the moons atmosphere. it looked like everyone was fighting in slow motion

A moonrock headed straight for y/n!! Jak and aric leaped in from of y/n trying to save them… but it was too late…

y/n fell to the ground, bleeding. Both jack and aric fell to their knees sobbing… 

"you get what you deserve" joe biden said before blood spurted out of his mouth…

It yas y/n!!! y/n threw one last moon rock, hitting joe biden right in the face. Jack and aric hugged y/n 

“IM SO GLAD YOURE ALIVE” jack shouted

“WE THOUGHT YOU DIED” aric sobbed

"but I didnt!!!!!" y/n said, and they smiled. and then everybody clapped and there was a marching band and big floaties featuring tv show and book characters like the macys parade 

(giant diary of a wimpy kid balloon float) 

And everyone yelled “YIPEE!!!!!!!!!”

zoo wee mama

(this is all true i saw it happen)

(I was the moon!!)

stay tuned for part 2

(there is no part 2)