depressing

i feel kinda alone idk... i deleted every single social media of mine so my online friends can't reach me all because of one boy. why did i let him control me like that holy shit. why do i have to be dependant. why can't i just be happy on my own? why do i have to mess my own life up just because the guy i like doesnt give me enough attention eventhough we're in a relationship. he hasnt asked me how i've been or generally messaged me in 2 days. im sick and tired of this bullshit.