Vent warning because I know nobody reads these anyways

So we're going for a trip somewhere where I know it'll be significantly colder than where I am now, and I already get VERY cold and I wanted to walk there at night. So like, I wanted a jacket lined with fleece instead of that awful sticky lining that most jackets use, and it had to have huge pockets so that it will fit my headphones when I'm not using them. I was initially going to make a new one, but a few days ago I made the sensible decision to instead work on one I already had, since I couldn't realistically make a jacket in 3 days. And so, I began working on one of my Nan's hand-me-downs, giving it a shorter zip, replacing the lining (she literally tore the old lining out making it unbearably thin) and shortening it. I was SO excited to finish it today so that it can go in the wash and I can get an early night and have tomorrow off, because heaven knows I have heaps of other things I need to do, on top of packing which fills me with stress as is. So I've been working pretty much non-stop today, making the entire house a mess, and it still isn't complete, and is currently unwearable. I mean, I can get it done by tomorrow night if I worked just as hard tomorrow, but I have other things to do and I wanted to relax and talk with my family so bad and I HAVE TO GET AN EARLY NIGHT BECAUSE WE ARE LEAVING EARLY IN THE MORNING.

I just. I did so much but at the end of the day it wasn't enough and now I have destroyed the only appropriate jacket, stressed myself out for no reason only to remind myself how utterly pathetic I am. I couldn't even finish the project I chose specifically BECAUSE of how quickly I could finish it, but it seems whatever I try to do, it never works out, almost specifically because I want to do it.

I am just so sick of getting stressed out last minute before big events. Maybe that's why I don't get excited anymore. I turn every exciting event into a huge project I need, and fail to, complete.