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Ready Player Three by Nicky Flowers (PARODY) (REAL)

a few weeks ago, i joke that i was going to write a parody "Ready Player Three" because i hate ernest cline more than his own mother is probably disappointed in him. then it stopped being a joke and i started working on it. then 20 minutes later, i abandoned the idea completely because the weed i bought arrived and i got distracted.

here's what i managed to write:

READY PLAYER THREE

by

NICKY FLOWERS


Chapter 1


Back to the Future Parts I, II, and III. The Karate Kid. The Shining. The Princess Bride. The Goonies. Porky's. Die Hard. Full Metal Jacket. Dune. Raiders of the Lost Ark, Temple of Doom, and The Last Crusade. Top Gun. Blade Runner. Dead Poets Society. Planes, Trains & Automobliles. The Outsiders. Beetlejuice. Stand by Me. Airplane! Platoon. Once Upon a Time in America. The Untouchables. Aliens. Time Bandits. Scarface.


Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back.


Star Wars: Episode VI - Return of the Jedi.


The Thing. Ferris Bueller's Day Off. The Terminator. Friday the 13th. Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure. Ghostbusters. Predator. Fast Times at Ridgemont High. A Nightmare on Elm Street. The Breakfast Club. Dirty Dancing. Gremlins. Big. Police Academy. E.T. the Extra Terrestrial. A Christmas Story. RoboCop. Raging Bull. Batman. Highlander. Willow. Caddyshack. The Lost Boys


Poltergeist. Footloose. Amadeus. The 'Burbs. Romancing the Stone. Labyrinth. Road House. The Blues Brothers. The Karate Kid Part II. Rocky IV. The Karate Kid Part III. Weird Science. Pretty in Pink. Trading Places. The Abyss. First Blood. WarGames. The Evil Dead. Can't Buy Me Love. Who Framed Roger Rabbit. Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior. Blue Velvet. An American Werewolf in London. They Live. The NeverEnding Story. Weekend at Bernie's. Wall Street. Uncle Buck. Short Circuit. Heathers. Brazil. Hellraiser. Octopussy. Maximum Overdrive. Adventures in Babysitting. Field of Dreams. Honey, I Shrunk the Kids. Working Girl. Clash of the Titans. Commando. Sixteen Candles. Excalibur. Steel Magnolias. The Fly.


Major League. Escape from New York. Friday the 13th Part 2. Lethal Weapon. Fatal Attraction. Do the Right Thing. The Elephant Man. Flash Gordon. Masters of the Universe. Conan the Barbabrian. Big Trouble in Little China. The Running Man. Rain Man. Little Shop of Horrors. Spaceballs.  Cinema Paradiso. The Cannonball Run. Heaven's Gate. The King of Comedy. Fright Night. Howard the Duck. Friday the 13th Part III . When Harry Met Sally…


Akira. Manhunter. Revenge of the Nerds. Krull. Bloodsport. Paris, Texas. My Neighbor Totoro. Beverly Hills Cop. Sleepaway Camp. Rocky III. Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter. Return to Oz. Christine. The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad!


Airplane II: The Sequel. The Color of Money. Dressed to Kill. Stand and Deliver. Raising Arizona. Friday the 13th: A New Beginning. Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives. Rambo: First Blood Part II. Porky's II: The Next Day. An Officer and a Gentleman, Pet Sematary. Stripes. Child's Play. Possession. The Last Starfighter. Back to School. My Bodyguard. Dangerous Liasons. Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome. Look Who's Talking. Sex, Lies, and Videotape. Risky Business. Videodrome. Popeye. Grease 2. Heavy Metal. Children of the Corn. Twins. The Last Temptation of Christ. Ghostbusters II.


This Is Spinal Tap. Earth Girls Are Easy. The Beastmaster. A Fish Called Wanda. Splash. Flight of the Navigator. Porky's Revenge. Valley Girl. The Return of the Living Dead. Urban Cowboy. Flashdance. Witness. Crocodile Dundee.


Evil Dead II. Red Dawn. Terms of Endearment. Red Heat. Tron. A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge. The Witches of Eastwick. Some Kind of Wonderful. The Monster Squad. The Great Outdoors. Three Men and a Baby. Near Dark. A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors. Sophie's Choice. Ordinary People. Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. Mannequin. Fanny and Alexander. Tango & Cash. Young Guns. Better Off Dead…


Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood. Little Monsters. The Big Chill. Tootsie. 48 Hrs. Ran. Blood Simple. Gandhi. Twilight Zone: The Movie. 9 to 5. Lifeforce. Midnight Run. Teen Wolf. Mississippi Burning. Outland. License to Drive. Say Anything… Superman II. Cobra. Streets of Fire. Bad Boys. Scanners. Leviathan. Innerspace.  Superman III. The Jewel of the Nile. Good Morning, Vietnam. The Last Emperor. The Dead Zone. The Blob. Chariots of Fire. Rambo III. Halloween II. Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan. Once Bitten. Bachelor Party. Star Trek III: The Search for Spock. Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home


Pee-wee's Big Adventure. Pink Floyd: The Wall. Yentl. Night of the Creeps. Body Heat. The Dark Crystal. Conan the Destroyer. Alien Nation. Creepshow. Blue Thunder. The Money Pit. Mystic Pizza. Cocktail. Driving Miss Daisy. The Fog. Sid and Nancy. The Golden Child. Real Genius. The Gods Must Be Crazy.  Beverly Hills Cop II. My Left Foot. Dead Ringers. Re-Animator. Harlem Nights. Cocoon. The Adventures of Baron Munchausen. The Fox and the Hound. Lethal Weapon. Dead Calm. Three Amigos!


Prom Night. Out of Africa. Brewster's Millions. Wings of Desire. Thief. Dirty Rotten Scoundrels. La Bamba. From Beyond. Runaway. Xanadu. Night of the Demons. The Cook, the Thief, His Wife & Her Lover. The Black Cauldron. The Land Before Time.


Chapter 2


The Wizard. fuck this actually


2 Kudos

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Cute Nobody

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Hey, uhm, can I steal this idea from you?


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