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Yesterday, I did the weirdest thing. I dressed in black. I gave myself heavy eyeshadow. I applied dark lipstick on for the first time in years. And part of me felt so confident and so happy.
I came to terms that I have never grown out of my emo/goth/scene phase recently, and actually wearing something to that effect made me feel wonderful. I think that whenever I get ready to dye my hair, I will be happy with my style evolution. The struggle is picking colors. So, I might have to pick a couple to use. I'm thinking either lime green or a hot pink. I might incorporate some blue in there as well, seeing as I have it in bulk (whoops. you know my fave color isn't just black!).
Today, I painted my nails black and I am obsessed at how pretty it came out. I feel like I want to wear makeup again. I feel beautiful. And I didn't think I would ever reach this point, given a lot of things that happened early in life. But I finally love myself and can take care of myself.
To those struggling, it does get better. It took 10 years to reach this point. It might be a slow process, but good things will come. I assure you.
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