(real) life jesus quote from the bible 2: crucifixion blitz


take heed, O thou whose name is but dung, for you will be plagued with gnats, flies and locusts! O ye plaything of Beelzebub, may you be cast onto a steaming dung-heap, I pray thou shalt be swallowed by a whale with excessively bad breath, ye discourager of the brethren! Woe unto thee, O ye bull of Bashan! Harken, for you will crash the king's best-loved chariot, O thou denizen of the underworld!
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-Jesus after being told taco bell was closed past 10:00 in his town, 2022


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