2/21/22

i've been in such a better mood these last few days. holyy shit. it's getting warmer outside. i can already feel it and it's kind of making me crazy. i cannot wait for warm weather. even though i get sunburnt so easily and we never do anything exciting over the summer, i'm still really excited. wintertime depression + all that. 

still stupid hung up on the idea of getting a guitar. i've got it all planned out now. i'm gonna try to get a job in may? probably around when the musical ends, and then i'll work during the summer and save up to buy the guitar. maybe i can get my parents to buy the amp. i just feel bad asking for a $900 guitar from my parents. i think it'd be nice if i could pay for most of it myself. 

also yeah, i joined tech crew for my school's musical. i did it in middle school but wasn't able to last year, so now i'm back on my shit!! super excited actually, crew was so fun for me and everyone else in it, hopefully it'll be just as fun this year. i think bella is joining, too. drama!!

i bought a dress for one of my friend's sweet sixteen parties this coming weekend and i'm so fucking excited. i made her a mix cd, and got her a book by her favorite artist and a painting. that's why i'm in such good spirits actually. got all my tests out of the way last week, plus this week is only four days. so four more days, then the party. and then two more weeks, and then daylight savings. and hopefully warmer weather. fingers crossed!

i bought TWO dresses this weekend. i know. 2021 me is NOT having it. lmao. i hated other girls and had a shit ton of internalized misogyny around this time last year.... yeah. whatever. now i'm better and actually find that caring about my appearance and wearing girly clothes is fun. who would've known? 

i wrote two really fucking good songs but i cannot for the life of me remember how this one goes. UGH. i'll try to re-learn it. 

also i've been super into the academy is..., they're probably one of my current favorite bands. i've been binging tai tv all week. don't tell william beckett but i totally have a crush on him.

that's all for now. will update after the party.

SONG RECS AGAIN:

sleeping with strangers - car seat headrest

everything we had - the academy is...

karma police - radiohead

moshi moshi (NOT acoustic version. alright. different song.) - brand new

lover i don't have to love - bright eyes

i'm gonna tell my therapist on you - pinkshift