Pls mom, I told u I like girls..

I've already told my mom that I like girls. It was about a year ago, and in that moment she said that it was okay and that she would always support and accept me. I was so happy because my biggest fear was losing my mom's love because of my sexuality.

Since that moment, nothing changed, and when I say nothing, I mean NOTHING. To this day, she keeps saying, "Oh, when you get a husband," or "Your future boyfriend..." I know she does that because, even if she said that she would accept me, deep inside she knows that she cannot bear the fact that her daughter is a lesbian. Not by now, at least. And I understand her, but the thing is that sometimes I feel kinda disappointed because when she said what she said, I was really hoping she'd accept me 100%.

I told her that there was a boy who apparently has a crush on me, and she got sooo excited and happy about that. When I asked her why, she said, "I just like to see that someone treats my daughter well," but ik it was more than that. She was looking for signs that I liked him back, but obviously I don't. And ik she was doing that because—even if she didn't notice—she was searching for something that would tell her that her daughter is straight, or at least bisexual...

I wanted to write about this for a while, and even if it is still happening, I guess now it's getting better. I mean, at least now she jokes about my sexuality (not to make fun of me in an aggressive way, that's just how we treat each other), and in a way, it shows that she is ACTUALLY accepting me.