I miss everything

I miss my childhood dead pets, I miss my dead relatives, I miss the girls that meant nothing and the one that didn't work out. I miss oportunities and I waste time. 

Over and over. 

I'm always missing something, I lack things and I waste time because of it.

I waste time because I'm always worried about things, scared, cautious. Now nothing will come back and I'm left to feel uncomplete.