socially stunted goblin

i get very upset whenever i do something wrong socially, for example sitting at the wrong table, inviting myself to places i wasn't invited to, not talking to people, missing out on fun activities, but i have to remind myself every time that while everyone else just socializes, for me it's an active effort every. fucking. time. 

it doesn't make me feel better or turns back time so i can fix my mistakes, but it's important to just accept it and think how i can improve... if i fixated on every mistake i made i would be dead by now