Vent

I don't really get time to myself. I'm homeschooled and share a room with my sis. She's messy and I've given up trying to keep our room consistently clean ages ago. I don't hang out in our room much, since my sis used to be in there all morning and afternoon everyday. Anytime I do go in there, someone bothers me eventually. My sister comes in the room almost every single time. It's annoying. She's not really trying to do anything wrong, though sometimes it's merely to annoy me. But it's really annoying how I can't just enjoy time to myself. Everyone has to know what I'm up to, or Im supposed to be doing something else. I have nothing to hide, but I can't do things when people know what it is. Like, I can't learn an instrument if my family knows, because then I immediately feel like they're going to expect me to finish learning, or to be at a higher level than I am. And I have no reason to feel this way. I think the issue is my fear of failure and fear of being a disappointment. I can't learn new things without expecting to fail somehow, and I don't want to risk failing those things. It holds me back and I hate it. But if I could just have a place to learn these things unbothered it would be easier...