that guy is old news!

i broke up with the bf from my last post back at the beginning of july - july 4th, to be exact. happy freedom day! i was really scared to do it, but knew i had to, because he was not a good bf at all... the only times i really felt like he cared was when i'd get super messed up drinking/smoking, because he would always clean my vomit and never lecture me or get mad. sometimes he'd still try to have sex with me, though... i thought it'd be hard and that i would cry a lot, but not this time. i went out as soon as it was over and met with some friends at a bar. later that week, i kissed two different boys on two different days. it was a good summer. i have a flashy new job which is pretty cool, because so many people i know from graduation are working at dollar general or waiting tables. this evening i'm going to dinner with three friends from high school. i've hung out with each of them since graduation, but they haven't seen each other, even though at one point we were all in a friend group together, so i'm really excited to see them reunite! i'm kinda sorta (totally) dating one of them - he's actually my ex from high school. i didn't wanna rush into another relationship right after my ex and i split, but i've known this guy for 5 years, and he's not forcing me to put a label on it. he's bought me so many flowers, though - i currently have two bouquets in my bedroom, because he got my most recent one before the last one he'd given me had even died! i'm glad college is over. i hated the proximity to people i didn't like - now it's so much easier to only spend time with my friends, and ignore the assholes. i moved back to my hometown, which has a great nightlife, so i go out every weekend - my college friends never wanted to drive an hour to the city over to go clubbing. i'm close with my family, so living with them has actually been great - missed them so much when i was at college! college is honestly overrated, i only went because i got a full ride and knew i could make connections to get a good job once i had my degree. the social aspect sucked, and the dating scene was nonexistant! any decent guy got snatched up freshman yr and was engaged by senior yr, leaving all the creeps and dudes who just want to fuck. my ex was pretty shitty, but actually seemed decent compared to the other guys on my campus. plus, we were in a friend group together, and i sort of felt like i didn't have a choice - a "hostage relationship", like nicole in class of 09 says. i knew he wasn't great, but i also didn't have any close friends up there and desperately needed some support when my best friend of 6 years dumped me on a random tuesday because her controlling & toxic gf is totally jealous of me. oh well. its only up from here!