Why me?…(vent)

Why am i like this…so dependent so dumb so stupid…

I should leave her but i cant…8 years and i cant find it in me to leave her..i hate her but i love her so much…she downgraded me so much to a point i normalized being a dog…maybe i am a dog, when she hits me i come back…i should quit…i should end it…but im scared…

Im such a pushover…a crybaby…i dont deserve the love i get…

Shes right i am an awful person and no one should talk to me…im always trying to save other people from their misery but no one saves me…im always the hero never the saved…its all her fault…

I need her company no matter how she hurt me…i love her…and she hates me…ill stand still and get more bruises and scars because this is what i was born to do…endure endure endure…

I hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this i hate this…