HEYYYY AGAIN HOW ARE YOU ?

another boring blog ! just for you !

so to start off strong i need to put something very clear on the table , i am overweight.... since im 10 i thinks and its BAD . And i hate it , so i just want to change but life ... oh life how i hate you have made it harder yet again , and im not just "complaining" or finding excuse , its medical. recently ive been seeing back and forth doctors, because after doing a blood test , my medical examiner (if this doesnt mean anything blame google traduction) discovered that i had health issues , due to whatever i dont actually know .. But the worst part is as soon as i started exercising and trying to change well the doctor just toldn me "the point is that you need to loose weight but , your condition makes it harder to loose it". GREAT.

but first i wanted to know why this sudden weight gain , because i wasnt always like that , as a newborn i even was underweight and it kinda clicked , when i was 10 two major things happened , first my parent divorced and the paradise of a loving perfect family i had in mind the shattered , revealing the sad truth of being dragged like a puppet for both parents happiness (i remember going under my desk to cry and oh boy i should of cried harder for what was about to come) but the same years i also got a super exiting intestinal obstruction (YAY) who practically made me die . so just for a second imagine just waking up on day at 10 and suddenly all of this happen.

So to resume , when i was a child i almost died and my parents got a divorce , made me stress or i dont know and eat way more and now , the results im overweight. And just when i wanna take matter in my own hands : we tell me i have to double the effort if i want the same result as anyone and that it will be much more harder . Perfect isnt it ?

Im currently 80 kg or 176 lbs (wow) at only 16 (enormous) 

I dont really know where to start not how to start and i've set myself a goal , i need to loose 30kg (or 66lbs) in one year (since i will probably have a trip to japan (not confirmed , ill will talk more about it)) and that i cant deal with all this shit anymore it's just so tiring 

Some people dont realize how exhausting it is to be fat , like , you get less friends , dont talk about love life it can just not exist , you cant do anything physical it ask you so much more efforts than anyone fit , you get tired more easily and im not talking about the self confidence bullshit , or your mind state. Sometimes i just want to die and it pushed me to do things i regret everyday just for some love of anyone , i used to feel envy from my other friends and just feel like shit all day because my friends are litteral top models but i want this to change this is so annoying .

ill try to update this everyday to keep a trace of the progress but i will talk about it to my mom this sunday.