My thoughts on love and relationships

This has always been a topic I’m very passionate about. I feel like a lot of media and whatnot really did kill romance in a sense. And there are a lot of different opinions on it. But personally, this is what I’ve gathered from my own experience.

First off, you are not one half of a whole. A lot of people like to say “they’re my other half” and while that’s cute, a lot of people take it very literally. You aren’t nothing without your partner, you’re a whole human being. I like the way Garnet put it, you don’t need to find your other half. You need to find your COMPLIMENT.

Which brings me to “opposites attract.” To a degree, this is true. But trust me, your compliment will not be the polar opposite of you. That doesn’t ever seem to end well. It also, will not be someone EXACTLY like you either. I like to think of it as Yin and Yang. The base, the majority of what they are, are completely opposite colors. But in the center of each, is a bit of the other’s color. Different enough, yet similar enough. Balanced.

Then, a thing I see a lot of people struggling with, is communication. Often times, we shove down our worries, annoyances and issues to not be a bother or to avoid conflicts. Let’s be real, nobody wants to argue with their partner. But the longer you leave those issues, the bigger they become. And those issues don’t NEED to be an argument. When you’re both honest about how you feel, and accept that your views might be different, you end up solving a lot of conflict already. It can be scary, but telling your partner when you’re hurt or upset or need to talk is very important. And if they have a problem with you confronting the issue, that’s a whole other problem.

Me and my boyfriend made a rule to never go to bed mad at each other. And we both highly value honesty, and being true to ourselves. I don’t think we’ve ever had an argument where we yelled at each other. And I think that’s because we both acknowledge our weak points in communicating, and try our best to understand where the other is coming from.

At the end of the day, as long as you feel comfortable, free, safe, and yourself, you know you’ve found your person. And if you haven’t found yours yet, I promise you, they’re out there somewhere.

(My credentials are: I have a bf, I’ve dated multiple people in my life, knew toxic couples, been in toxic relationships, and witnessed a divorce. I am well seasoned, in the art of… uh… relationship-ing…? 😂)

-Alivia