A stupid poem that kept me awake

I don't like it, it feels messy, troubled and unorganized, but here I am, still with it im my mind , to the point I couldn't sleep for awhile

Whirling Butterflies

There she walks, a blooming haze

Allured me once, through flowers made of lace

I cannot feel, I cannot hear,

But i sense her touch, an inconsistent fear

A pale shadow made of mist

Who's call was like a bliss

I couldn't help, but walk past through,

The weeping willow that i mourn

There I sat, watching her grace

Peaceful walk, wrapped in peace

She pierced my skin, with such ease 

And i only ached to see her face,

A toxic gaze, wrapped in lace..

I kissed and mourned, over a field,

Whirling butterflies, were her shield.

She couldn't drop her filthy weapon

She saw behind me a woman in apron.

A black dress intimidating her light

Was she scared? She couldn't fight

Maybe respect was all over the place

But it didn't feel like it was the case

I still wonder if that's the same

Soul whom i share with my name 

Was it the same woman all along?

Or was it her enemy sitting in fog

I cannot feel, I cannot hear

Yet i know, this is surreal.