The experience that ruined how I perceive intimacy.

Okay, I'm exaggerating but it did effect me.

Also like the preface this by saying not all men whateva. TW: SEXUAL THINGS? TRAUMA?

So recently I was talking to this guy and I actually really liked him. He was just my type.

But then the freakiness started to come about, and then personal questions (about my anatomy n stuff).

I'm not against sharing that kind of things but it was just the intentions behind it. I felt like an

object. I felt like I had to sexualize myself (I don't really know why but I did). It was probably the

worst relationship i'd been in. I hated my body, I was repulsed by it, not because it didn't look like

the way I wanted, it's because it just felt like someone eye candy. I didn't feel valuable. For a

while, I was repulsed by the idea of intimacy with a man because of how he treated me. I felt like I

wasn't in control of my body, but of course I was. Once he asked if I could do something or him

(that was sexual) and when I said no, he kept asking why. And that was the final straw. He didn't

respect me. 

I didn't know someone through a screen could affect me so much 🤔

also after I stopped talking to him I sorta was so affected by what he did I turned into a lesbian, like dead ass repulsed by men.