ANOREXIC IMAGES, OUR BODIES DESTROYED

ANOREXIC IMAGES, OUR BODIES DESTROYED

Tomorrow if I was ran over by a car and scarred for life, none of you would care. Mutilated, disfigured. A monster. It's horrible to even think about that happening, but I've noticed the trend in "I love your looks" responses and no one bothering to take a look behind the pictures and notice the words screamed in vain, written in a time of need. sacrifice. its what I do every day to myself. I cant give credit to everyone becuz I do have many friends on here who do care and read what I have to say, but everyone else makes me hollow .. sweet bruises .. in a spilt second my face could be smashed in, forever a fucking troll. no more pretty eyelashes or makeup, no more friends, no more admirers .. no more life. loneliness would swallow me up like a giant fish. I almost pray for that day to come.

Makeup. ersatz. false reason. its all here but I choose not to let that side show. the horror of impossibility. my strength can only reach so far. but I'm recognized every day for my beauty. my face, my makeup, my mouth, my skill in destroying something human and normal. I'm foreign, alien. but why do looks matter to everyone? they can be taken away so fast that its hard to believe you ever had them. plastic surgery and psychology help isn't going to save your soul. so as you see me all fattened with glamour, pregnant with glitz and speaking truth .. just remember: one second and its over.

It's time to face the real world. The planet has become one big mirror and it makes me sick. Everyday I see people trying so hard with priorities and desperate attempts at individuality, but what's behind it all? Everyone wants to be a Hollywood star with every second of vanity and fame. As we all grow older we see these "beauty queens" every day of our lives. We walk down the street and notice a billboard of the same blonde whore trying to look pretty, we see magazines filled with images of wafer-models and anorexic imagines. It's "cool" to destroy yourself. We're raised and taught that those are the people we should become. Male or female, socially acceptable or not, a person that is soooo fixated by their own appearance is vain and a little too self-important. Being vain comes from wanting so bad to be what were not, what we pretend to live for and what we'll never be ... It's hard to understand why someone would want to be the next rock star just so they can become something fake. But we watch TV, we read articles and talk about looking like actors and singers ... why? Society has developed itself into a painful course of images. All we hear about is Dieting, who's hot and "Oh my god, the dress!" and who's the ugliest.

Who really cares? You do.

Appearance has become such a huge factor into every day life. Losing weight is the new trend and dying your hair every other month is "cute". If you're considered "over weight" by the people around you (like at school or work), your life will miserable. Harassment happens everyday whether we want to admit it or not, and it's because of what we grow to accept. Seeing that beautiful girl on the front page is what's wanted SO bad, but it can't be reached. Is it fun to analyze your body, get plastic surgery and wear a fake smile? Underneath the make-up, clothing and money is a lifeless person that's been changed to sell and be marketed. We are the ones buying all the weight loss programs, we are the ones trying to live and not be treated horribly. Who cares if you're a bit heavy. Does that change what kind of person you really are? The old saying "what's inside counts" hasn't been understood in centuries.

Getting rich and creating the next scandal is always in the back of CEO's and record companies minds, because if you're pretty it doesn't matter. Your face covers up all the lies. I don't think it will ever be established to like what you have, what your "God" gave u ... As long as our eyes are filled with pretty pictures and skeleton models, its useless. Try to look at yourself and see something good. Its hard ... but it can be done. Forget the fake eyelashes and the push-up bras, what's good about you? Everyone has something inside that can be found. Personalities are now shot with vanity, and ego's are bigger then my waist size. If you say "I'm so hot" you're probably a low-life who wishes he/she was what we can't steal. Forget the nose-jobs and fake nails for once and try to act human. Try to get to know someone next time before saying "she's too ugly and fat" because it actually hurts the people you're talking about. Could we make other's feel nice for a change instead of bashing their life-style?

I wear make-up because its spiritual and makes me feel calm, its art and its my passion; not so everyone can like me ... because not many people do. It's obvious I'm not a super star. It's obvious I could care less what someone who's never spoken to me says. Burn the magazines and turn off MTV, its slowly decaying who we once were.