ST4R1NG....

I can't stand people who stare... It's so creepy. I wonder what people think when they stare at someone. Are they aware? Zoning out? A FUCK1NG CR33P? You never know. All you know is that it's freaking you the H3LL 0UT!

                    
Most of the times when i find someone staring at me the first feeling i feel is anger. R4G3 even. WH4T TH3 FUCK D0 Y0U W4NT? ST0P FUCK1NG ST4R1NG! UUGHH.... But then it becomes uncomfortable and weird. I try my best not to make eye contact back but even if my eyes were rippe* out i'd still feel it when someone stares at me. It makes going outside 4BS0LUT3 T0RTUR3! It's anxiety driven, fed by fear and low self esteem. A past of bullying and harrassment will make sure you H4T3 being surrounded by people.                                                                           

Now a question that plagues my mind. Is it wrong to assume that people are always out to get you? Always staring, waiting for you to fuck up. I think it's hypocritical in a way. We, the anxiety driven emotional wreck always assume that people are always gonna think the worst of us. We have been conditioned to think this way through constant negative experiences. Us poor souls have just never been BL3SS3D by society to with good experiences that would have helped us learn that people aren't bad. I think that alot of prejudice and opinions form through experience.

Think about it. We judge others based on our negative experiences. Random people on the street. We are always on guard when we go out. Worried what others think and say about us behind out backs. Unless you know these people, is it even really fair? Aren't we judging them as they might be judging us outcasts? For the clothes we wear? The way we do our make-up? The things we like and how we choose to enjoy life. I mean, come on. I highly doubt none of you has been on the street, saw a group of typical blonde girls, all with same face make-up. All wearing whatever is trendy with a lack of style or individuality and you haven't thought "Yikes...." That's not anxiety, that's judging. Yet you still feel nervous walking past them. It is a little bit of an exception since alt people and general outcasts are looked down upon by society to begin with. But does that make it okay?