Swan's Post #5 : Due Date.

Hello again, It's nice to see you. I'm not sure if I should put a TW (Trigger Warning) on certain topics that I talk about. If you don't like things related to death, I'd recommend you go at the moment. Have a nice day if you end up doing so, and to stay safe as well. I went to visit a graveyard recently, nothing big but I didn't feel how I should've. Sad, I didn't feel the familiar thoughts of mourning about the people who are no longer with us. These people in particular were a grandparent and a old friend, it was my grandparent's birthday and the old friend was conveniently close to them. I know that I should've been crying or at least frowning but it felt peaceful and so colorful that it was impossible to try and fit with the energy around me. We sang happy birthday to the gravestone and they we're already trying to leave. I stood there, waving goodbye to them in a way. It's unfortunate that they're gone but I don't know how to feel about it since it was years ago, I'm not over it but still feels empty in a way. When I'm gone I wish to be buried instead of burned to ashes of who I once was. I want my gravestone to act as a bench and to be close to a tree, my body will most likely become tree food. Make jokes when I'm gone, leave notes on my grave, talk to me as if I am still very much there, and I will listen to the jokes, read what you wrote, and pay attention to the words you spoke. A lot to ask, but when will I truly die is when my name is lastly muttered through you or another.