ok im sooooo cooked

So... I got my amazing little “incentive” from the government (and 200 reais/40 dollars was gone in 3 days...)

i cant stand the federal institute anymore!!! The exams are humiliatingly difficult, the teachers arent teaching the material needed for the exam, AND I NEED GRADES FOR A PREP COURSE... this is crazy.

here in brazil, prep courses (87% of them) dont require grades like regular school, but the one im taking (for some crazy reason?) requires me to get a 6 (the average most brazilian schools require on exams to pass to the next grade) just to get the certificate, AND THAT’S INSANE!!!! On top of studying for my regular school exams, I have to study for this shitty prep course just to get A SHITTY CERTIFICATE THAT WONT GIVE ME ANY EXTRA POINTS ON THE ACTUAL EXAM. on top of this damn routine, im going to have to start another damn prep course, but at least this one will give me extra points on the exam hehe, but its still fucking exhausting!!! I dont have time to read, play games, or draw anymore and thats making me so fucking sad

My family says I was lucky to get accepted into this shitty prep course, but if I keep this up im definitely either going to get worse with my depression or go completely crazy (or maybe both at the same time)

this shitty prep course is total crap. I totally get why the federal institute is so competitive (since it’s run by the federal government and offers “quality” education, with a music room, a theater club, lots of cool people, and sooooo many other things), but it’s completely crazy!! I haven’t even fully enrolled yet and i already have enough paperwork to stock an entire stationery store.