29.05.2026

I've been treated like garbage by a lot of different people, in a lot of different scenarios, in varying degrees of righteousness. I hate this persistent, nagging feeling of anxiety. every time something goes right, something else goes wrong. every time I think things might be getting better, I get a bout of anxiety for everything and anything else. The anxiety itself is like a snake (??) in my stomach. Long and cold and sensory in that weird, all consuming way. It's not the hot, instant, acidic nausea of a panic attack, more like ice down my esophagus, stomach and around my liver.

I got new makeup. Trying to improve in that regard. I got money for my graduation and I'm wondering whether I should get a tattoo or something else or ask my parents for my new phone. I feel sad 24/7, but at this point it's a constant. updates soon?? Idkkkk.