sooo

hey hows it going? me personally ive been fine. i havent really been taking my lexapro recently so maybe not as good as usual, but at this moment i feel good!. ive seen some cool peeps on ponytown today and i really wanna be friends with all of them, though i feel im not cool enough, maybe not as funny as they probably are. other than that, i have to march in a memorial day parade tomorrow with another schools band and im super excited!!!!!! i recently got a new wood clarinet and i so wanna put it to use especially after the concert i had last week, it didnt go so well, even sadder being it was my last one of the year..

about friends again, i see people who are so close and i cant help but feel so envious. not in a bad way of course, but more longing. im horrible @ interaction and im usually too shy to interact first even when its online, and ill get really nervous/anxious sometimes ill take awhile to reply or not reply at all and i always feel bad, but im trying to fix that. I need more p!atd friends!! 

my wrist is hurting lol, i wont usually type this much unless for an essay or for lyrics. people probably think im weird since theres not really anyone in my grade that dress like me or have the same motives, even my own friends @ school get emberassed around me when i play anything remotely rock. like sorry i like something other than drake or partynextdoor?? tthey call me and the music emo whenever they hear something even close to an even classic rock tune. it irritates me. if i try to express i want to start a band like patd or pop/punk-rocky they will judge me.. i dont know, i just need people i can relate too.