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Lord of the rings collection

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♡ LOTR Fellowship of the ring

Goosey: 10/10

cried, got jumpscared 4 times.

REALLY GOOD, I only know some of the characters//plot//ALL THE MEMES so that helped.

thinks the hobbits accents are iconic (literally has the same accent, why did nobody tell me?? is this why people used to call me frodo???)

'i dont have any quotes, i was too locked in'

Pepe: 10/10 (gave them this rating before we even watched them all, bro has watched these movies once per year since he was a kid, so that explains it) 

'I think this is the most quiet Ive ever seen Goosey'

LOTR Fun fact: To render the special effects for Gollum it would often take around six hours for a single shot.

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♡ LOTR The two towers 

Goosey: 8/10, long but really good and made me cry, like good dick.

this one was longer, felt like I couldn't enjoy the end bc of the submerged stuff :(( 

'no crunchie birdsies' // 'what we need is a few good taters'// 'you don't have any friends nobody likes you' // 'whats it doing? stupid fat hobbit'

'It's okay Gollum I also like it raw' (no context wanted//needed)

Okay so Legolas can shoot a guy ON HORSE like 100 feet away but most men cant even piss without getting it on the toilet seat???? are we deadass???

I LOVE GOLLUM!!! ('aww I want one'), was excited to see 'we're taking these hobbits to isangard' meme, now the song is stuck in my head xo

'Dude I think Gollum has OCD' LMAOOO (intrusive thoughts blah blah blah)

only just realised this is what smiling friends parodied in that once episode lmfaooo (peak lmfao/)

'holy shit???'//'we are so back'//'Okay, this movie has immediately been redeemed'

-Goosey when Gandalf made his epic comeback.

unpopular opinion butttt I deadass believe Frodo is the least cool character, what does he actually do?? apart from almost die and carry a piece of jewellery :II

Pepe: 10/10, cried multiple times (valid), 

GIMLI: Come on. We can take them. ARAGORN: It's a long way. GIMLI: (looks and hestitates, then mumbles) Toss me. ARAGORN: What? GIMLI: (crossly) I cannot jump the distance! You'll have to toss me! Aragorn nods and reaches down to Gimli's back. Gimli closes his eyes. GIMLI: (suddenly opening his eyes) Don't tell the Elf. ARAGORN: Not a word. (and he throws Gimli onto the causeway amongst the uruk-hai and jumps after him)

 (Legolas)“Shall I describe it to you, or would you like me to find you a box?”

LOTR Fun fact: A majority of the riders of Rohan were women with fake beards to pass as men on the horses, this is because most of the trained horses were owned by women and it was the only way to shoot without the horses getting spooked.

 (i love women in male dominated fields lmfaoooo)

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♡ LOTR return of the king

Goosey: 9/10, Goosey is not a fan of action films so is slightly biased, was high but made the experience better tbh, was so fucking locked in.

'stupid fat hobbit' (always makes me laugh) // 'The salted pork is particularly good.'

I FUCKING HATE DENETHOR, WORST FATHER OF THE FUCKING CENTURY!!!! DEATHHHHHHH, justice for Faramir plz, poor guy :((

'I know I cant save middle earth...I just want to help my friends'

'Don't go where I can't follow' (INSTAND TEARS WAAAAAAAA)

'I too ride to ruin' (Goosey has to make at least 1 perverted joke an hour to avoid exploding xo)

Sam is still my favourite character, HE IS THE REAL HERO!!! I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL!!!!!

I still think Mister Frodo is an absoloute MELT for being mad at Sam??? bro he's saved your ass like 100 times already, IT WAS JUST A PIECE OF BREAD FUC K OFF FRODO YOU FUCKING DICKWAD!!! 

btw, just a reminder that Sam literally walked to HELL AND BACK before asking his girl out>>??? type shit, gimme that nerdy little hobbit man xo

Side note, I genuinely would rather watch this all over again 10 times than watch GOT, that shit is just filler, at least this was entertaining THE WHOLE FUCKING TIME, I WASN'T BORED ONCE (I admit I did ask Jeppe for a break in the middle of each film for snacks//a bathroom break but I fear thats valid tbh, I also had fidget toys the whole time but thats also irrelevent)

(I had crackers, an absurd amount of water, vanilla iced coffee and peanut butter ice cream btw))

literally squealed when she saw Sam getting married, IM SO HAPPY RAAAAAAAAAAAA

.”I will not say do not weep for not all tears are an evil” jesus fucking christ, Gandalf has BARS.

'EWWWW HARVEY WEINSTEIN??? FUCK OFFFF!!!!!' (Goosey seeing the credits lmao)

cry count: 8 (apparently, he's lying)

Pepe: 10/10, was locked in as expected. thought Goosey would fall asleep//pass out due to weed, HE WAS WRONG LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ((I expect an apology xo))

cried multiple times (like a real man frfr) asked Goosey about 100 times 'are you crying' 

locked in the whole movie, drank a shit ton of water and nutella icecream (He then said he felt sick after lmao, CONSUME WITH CAUTION)

'Goosey what would you do for a night with him? (sam)'

 'depends how tall he is, lemme google it....apparently he's 4 foot'

 'aww. hes almost as tall as you!' 

'HUH? the fuck you mean almost??? I'm 5 foot 1!!!!'

'thats only a foot'

Yeah, I'm one foot taller than him but he can give me his footlong' (valid)

((fun fact, Subway got sued because their 'footlongs' are only 11 inches lmao))

Gimli: "I never thought I'd die fighting side by side with an Elf." Legolas: "What about side by side with a friend?" Gimli: "Aye. I could do that."

cry counter: 2 (hes a fucking liar, bro was whimpering through the whole thing)

LOTR Fun fact: The actor who played Gollum routinely drank 'gollum juice' on set to avoid straining his throat due to the taxing voice acting

• lemon juice
• honey
• boiled water
• fresh ginger
• cinnamon

extra fun face goosey has been drinking this shit for years, its super good for the flu lmaooo

spent 5 minutes forcing him to make a formal apology because he was wrong, Goosey didnt fall asleep or be too high so therefor HE WAS WROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG :)

SPOILER ALERT: WE WATCHED THE HOBBIT FILMS, GOOSEY TOOK 0 NOTES BECAUSE 'SHE COULDN'T LOCK IN', COMPLAINED FOR 90% AND THOUGHT THERE WAS TOO MUCH CGI, COULD'VE BEEN CONDENSED INTO ONE MOVIE, BLAH BLAH BLAH