do you miss me like i miss you?

wind up in a memory, 

surrounded by you

two sides of a mirror

two souls built in one

i used to think you might know me

(I didn't even know 

you) 

were you really thinking of me? cause i miSs you too

i miss a version of you that no longer exists

just as you've probably missed me

i have changed. i am on my way to become someone else, someone  completely different from who I've ever been before. 

or maybe, the closes thing to me I could find

There's so many "you's" and not enough "Me's". But now, I have more than one to choose from. Finally, I am evolving. 

I guess I'll never really feel "human". But sometimes, I have glimpses of humanity. And they honestly always seem to come from mistakes. You learn. Sometimes there's no right answer. Sometimes you're meant to learn. I wonder if you learnt something. I learnt I should've never trusted you. 

And yet, I still miss walking by your side and laughing. It's really all I miss. Sometimes you did make me feel like shit too. 

And when I say that, I can't help but remember him, too. 

I think I miss him a bit more than I miss you. 

But I still hate him, too. I kinda no longer care if he's dead or not. I think I really am over that. I wish it had never happened. I wish we were still friends, just friends, nothing more. 

I kinda wish I never met you. 

As for her....well. She's the only one I truly miss. Always. All the time. 

And somehow, she's also the only one who is still around.

I guess that's what love is. A bond you can't break. Unbreakable....

Love is so confusing for me. Unattainable, yet, always within reach. It's such a foreign concept...it comes on so many forms, and so different for everyone. I have been so full of love, and so empty of it. 

Love is so strange. it's all around you. 

We were talking and laughing just like always. My arm was in yours as we walked. And then, I saw you, walking right in the opposite direction. And I pulled you, (the other you) by the arm, avoiding you. I even felt kinda proud that I could do that without saying anything or having a panic attack. And then, when I woke up, sweaty and confused... when did you first become a danger to me? I think I know the day. At University...it was in the old campus. You didn't even know I had a breakdown that day. I thought you hated me. You were always so erratic. I guess I never really understood you. And that's what I liked the most. That you never really let me. 

I think I understood a side of you that no one else really did, just like you did to me. But at the same time, there's other sides of you that I never really....unlocked. And that's fine. I guess, in a way, I've become like you. Closed off.  Did you hate me, or were you just like that? I'll never really know. 

I'm hungry....