Oh to not feel so incredibly wrong all the time

i looked in the mirror before i got into the shower today . i stared at myself  -  my arms, my hips my waist especially my chest . i feel like . its hard to explain . each time i look at myself i feel like im looking at someone different. they have my face but this body doesnt belong to me . i feel disgusted by my own form . i dont feel human. who would want someone like this ? like me ? who would ever want to love, or even befriend the defective, scarred, creature that claims to be a guy ? was having a body that felt like it was supposed to be mine really too much to ask ?