Idk pt2.

I try to convince myself not to hate you. I know I truly can't hate you; I love you too much. But sometimes I wish I could, because I really don't understand you, and you make me not understand myself either. Nothing about you makes sense, and yet you are everything to me, even if I feel like nothing. Why is everything like this? 

I see you and that makes me happy, I have you close and I feel all the peace I need, I don't know what else to do, I feel like I'm waiting for someone who doesn't care if I wait for them or not, that's horrible.

And I feel worse, because I want you to be mine, I want you to be mine,  mine, mine , mine. 

Not to share you with anyone, because I'm crazy and selfish, I can't handle things like this anymore, your indifference hurts me. 

I want to believe you, I want to think you love me, and I can't convince myself of it. 

Maybe, just maybe, it would be easier for me to hate you and erase you from my life, even if I die in my sadness.

 Should I do it? I don't know.