friendships

As the days pass, I find it more and more difficult to trust the friendships I have. 

Problems constantly, known for a few days, weeks, months, and even years doesnt matter.. a problem will emerge somehow.

"Maybe I am the problem?" I constantly ask myself, yet I cannot find a single reason why I would be..

Friends for years, seen in real life. Might be awkward between us when there's no screen in between althought it works. Yet, the only place I managed to put my trust in them, the internet.. They managed to backstab me in the worst way possible, ruining my friendships for unknown reasons..

Friends for months, closer than ever from the start. Sure it was weird and even some lies. Attachment to its fullest, yet when I needed them most they left, as if the connection never existed.

Friends for weeks, happy to know. Familial bonds, or so I thought. Barriers unknown, stupid, no sense. For others, just for days they have known. I did nothing, but I guess you could still be blamed for things you would never do.

Three examples of the many, stories of how I lost those who were once important, yet apparently it was one sided, I guess? 

I hope for a future where my friendships would finally last, never get betrayed, backstabbed, or blamed for things I would never do. I hope my friends Love and care for me the same way I do for them.

May friendships forever lasting reach me, never to be left alone again.