You Know How It Goes

Been a while. It's been real hard. Trying to juggle everything all the time, its draining. Its not even a lot, school, work, friends and family, and that's it. But its all so damn hard, like I'm dragging ten tons behind me at all times. Like I'm being pulled down by everything always. I have no drive or motivation to do anything, ever. I don't want to go outside i don't want to get out of bed, i don't want to watch anything, listen to anything, there is nothing. No matter how down I've ever been I've never felt like that before. Just nothing. And I try, at least i think about trying, i dream about trying, i maybe do one nice thing for myself a day if I'm lucky, which is better than some so i should be grateful. And it sucks, I'm very lucky, i just cant seem to feel any better. Keep your chin up I suppose!